The UGLY truth!

So after being disappointed with not seeing the results from my GM diet with my old scale,  I decided it was time to upgrade. 
Even though my clothes were getting lose. ...I didn't believe it was just inches. 
So I ordered online and it took a week to get the digital scale. After all ... All the websites online said it was better to have a digital scale.

I kept going to the gym.  6 days a week
.... working out. .. doing weights as well. 
Then it finally came.  I was so excited. 
So I quickly took it out of the box. .. put 1kg if sugar on it to check the accuracy and then went to my room and undressed and stood on the machine. 

When I stood on the machine it had a max weight of 150kgs...I knew for sure I was not even close to that number. 
But when I stepped on it, it would flash the number 156.9 ......157??? This can't be right. ..... maybe it's broken.  So I stood on it again. .... again 156.9. So I told Zach who was in the room at the time to come check the machine as I think it's broken. He got up and stood on it and it flashed 81.5... He was like.  Oh I've lost weight. 
So he said try it now. .... again I stood on it and it flashed 156.9!
I quickly ran to the bathroom and just broke down in tears!
This was the first time in my life that the numbers on the scale upset so much to just cry. ..
Zach was wondering what was happening. .. kept telling him to leave me alone.  My friend was whats apping me to find out if I was coming to the gym at 4:30 and at the moment I just wanted to quit everything .
I'm a failure. ..
I'm kidding myself. ....
I'm a total fat joke.........
I hit my low point. 
During this time my friend is trying to convince me that it's just a number. ... just come to the gym. ... dont give up.... don't quit.... give it more time. 
I just wanted to hide....vanish. ... never to be seen again. 
After about 30 minutes of crying. ... doubt. ...I decided I would go to the gym..... why give up on those stupid numbers.....I was feeling better daily. .... but I had to make serious changes in my eating habits. 
I am not a quitter this time.  I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna get fit. 

From April till August. ...I manged to lose 24kgs.
I'm not sure what my starting weight was. ... so I just figured I would say I was 160kgs. 

Today to step on that digital scale and to see it say LESS than 136kgs is a start to of my journey to lose 80+kgs.

I'm really not on any particular diet. .. but I have made some serious changes. 
I've totally stopped drinking Coke/Pepsi.
I limit my calories per day. 
I work out as hard as I can each time in hit the gym. 
I don't go to the gym 6 days a week. ..I go 4 days. 
I found that I have more energy in the mornings vs the afternoon. 
I spend 2 hours each time I hit the gym and split my cardio training to 2x instead of all at once. 
I read a ton about HIIT workouts. 
I've even started running now. 

I've learned that sometimes we have to listen to our body and when it needs to rest... don't force it.

In August I had a ton of down time.  My maid quit so I was in charge of cleaning the whole house... was missing the gym. When I finally hired a cleaning company to help out 1x per week so I just have to do light cleaning the rest of the week ....I had gotten busy helping a friend with relocating their household goods. 
Then when I was done. ..I had missed 2 weeks of the gym.... then I came down with a nasty chest infection that took 15 days to recover.
So the entire month of August I didn't go to the gym.
But I still manged to lose 4kgs. So I was happy...
I learned in August that even if I miss the gym. ...I can still eat right.  Accomplished! !!

Now for September!
I'm back in action. .. going strong working out harder. ...
Now I'm doing the gym in the morning. .. and swimming laps in the evening! 
I burn about 1500 calories per day of working out. So I'm excited! 

So follow me on my journey to a healthy way of life. ...... because this is not a quick fix. .... This is a long term commitment to myself to be fit and healthy!